"Hey, guy that's smoking in front of the public library right when storytime is letting out...you're a dumb ass."
"I know that you come to Costco for the free lunch, but it berating the sample giver-outer that the sample sizes are "too small" is not only greedy, but stupid. Shut. Up."
"My darling Boo, I love you with all my heart and soul, but if you don't stop whining every time you open your mouth, I *will* sell you on the black market. Any idea how much I can get for a blonde-haired, blue-eyed kid?"
"Douche-bag that lives 4 houses down...yes, I know you have Harleys. Yes, I know you are a cop. That still won't stop me from calling the cops on your ass if you continue to blaze up and down as fast as you can. Won't you feel crappy if you hit one of my kids?"
"Oh, hai, people on teh interwebz. Learn how 2 spell. Kthxbai."
"Oh my fucking god...quit driving 10 miles per hour below the speed limit in the FAST LANE! Oh, and don't give me a dirty look when I pass you on the right either. If you would abide by the speed limit and the rules of the road, I wouldn't of had to."
Showing posts with label Costco. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Costco. Show all posts
Tuesday, November 23, 2010
Shopping Hell
People that know me know that I'm not the best shopper in the world. In fact, I shop like a man. I like to get in, get out, and get it done. <insert dirty joke here>
That being said, I really enjoy grocery shopping--I know where everything is, so it's easy for me to grab what I need with little disruption or stress...unless the grocery shopping involves a trip to Costco.
I made what I hope was to be a "quick trip" but seeing how it was the Saturday before Thanksgiving, I clearly was delusional. Parking lot? Packed. Carts? None to be found (good thing I grabbed one from the parking lot...mama didn't raise no dummy!) Inside? Shopping anarchy--people hovering like vultures around the sample stations; shoppers just STOPPING in the middle of the aisles to sit and chat with their neighbors; people going up the down side...AWFUL.
I tried to follow the accepted rules for shopping...I moved my cart out of the way when I needed to stop and look for something; I paid attention to my surroundings so if I DID need to move my cart, I could with a quickness; I attempted to stay to the right side of each aisle...but due to the sheer and utter chaos that was Costco, my attempts were an exercise in futility.
Fortunately, I won't need to return to Costco until well after Thanksgiving. Did I mention that Costco is across the street from the mall? And it's almost Christmas? Oy.
That being said, I really enjoy grocery shopping--I know where everything is, so it's easy for me to grab what I need with little disruption or stress...unless the grocery shopping involves a trip to Costco.
I made what I hope was to be a "quick trip" but seeing how it was the Saturday before Thanksgiving, I clearly was delusional. Parking lot? Packed. Carts? None to be found (good thing I grabbed one from the parking lot...mama didn't raise no dummy!) Inside? Shopping anarchy--people hovering like vultures around the sample stations; shoppers just STOPPING in the middle of the aisles to sit and chat with their neighbors; people going up the down side...AWFUL.
I tried to follow the accepted rules for shopping...I moved my cart out of the way when I needed to stop and look for something; I paid attention to my surroundings so if I DID need to move my cart, I could with a quickness; I attempted to stay to the right side of each aisle...but due to the sheer and utter chaos that was Costco, my attempts were an exercise in futility.
Fortunately, I won't need to return to Costco until well after Thanksgiving. Did I mention that Costco is across the street from the mall? And it's almost Christmas? Oy.
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